Monday, August 31, 2009 4:38 AM
Now is like 4.38am in the morning and I, Jenny Lim, is still not asleep. Oh whats the point, even if I force myself to sleep, I'll only fall asleep at 5 then I have to wake up 15mins later. Might as well stay up. All I can say is that I think this is the latest I have ever stayed up till. Well, can't blame me. I just can't sleep. Dang, I don't wanna get insomnia...
3:28 AM
Ok its now 3.28 in the morning and I'm still not asleep.. Sorry but I just can't seem to fall asleep.. I think I really am getting insomnia soon. Gosh I hope not, N levels are like just a few days away. oh please oh please I pray I won't get insomnia. At least a fever the most... Ok I am currently making my DIY teachers day card for Ms siti. drawing and such..Ok till then
1:34 AM
Time's now 1++ && yours truly still can't sleep. Wonder why?... I promise that if this keeps up, I will get insomnia REALLY soon. UNLESS I am already suffering from it. Uh oh, not good. Why you may ask, its cos N's are NEXT WEEK! && I promised myself I will force myself to sleep more especially when there is a paper the next day. DIE DIE DIE! I gotta sleep.!!! HELLPPP!!!
Labels: insomnia
Sunday, August 30, 2009 11:33 PM
TODAY
- woke up at 1pm feeling very sickish
- stayed at home till 5+++
- went TM with mum
- bought T'cher's day present
- bought Subway(take out)
- Typing blog
YESTERDAY
Went to Singapore Science Centre with PTC youths and Aunty Lily. Dont wanna elaborate, shall let the pics and vids do the talking. **CAUTION** Pic and vid quality will be so horrible it will harm some people's eyes!!** Just kidding~
Skeleton(random)
Ok thats all for Science Centre. Well I'm now currently writing down the chords for 'One more ment' for tomorrow's teacher's day performance in class. But also trying to make a teacher's day card for Ms siti. LOVE HER SO MUCH! hahas well, thats all for now!
Friday, August 28, 2009 11:22 PM
Today has been alright~ But I just wanna bring up something from what I've observed from today. After what I've seen, heard and felt, I can say that the girls in our class are slowly beginning to get closer. Maybe because we are starting to share feelings? Hahas all I can say is that there was alot of crying. (scene; after school, at the girls toilet )At first Carin and Afiqah were crying cos of something[ nothing concerning anything you all should ] then Felicia, Leona, Tinyam, Siti,Natalie, Shini and a few went to comfort them girls.(sorry if I forgot , I have a memo of a goldfish!) So then while I was walking to the toilet, Effika told me everyone was crying in the toilet. So I decided to see how bad was it. So, being the so called happy go lucky me went in a saw that nearly 3/4 of them were sitting on the floor crying. So I went in hurriedly and ask what happened. Then Leona grabbed my hand and said, " Jen, sorry if I have not been a good friend..." Worse was that as she was saying that, tears were swelling up in her eyes. As I saw that, I myself started to tear! OMG! I promised myself not cry after that time... But it didn't last long.. OMG I cried.... LEONA BTE MOHD SOFI YOU MADE ME CRY!!!! Lol Kidding well I wanna sleep now, tired...PIGGY ME! okok Just wanna say I LOVE ALL THE GIRLS IN MY CLASS and maybe some of the guys... ok NIGHTS!
Labels: i'm a very emotional person
Wednesday, August 26, 2009 6:55 PM
Currently lying on my bed feeling very sick and super tired. While I was on my way home, I felt super dizzy and I just felt like fainting but I got no choice but to tahan. So here I am lying on the bed covering myself with the covers, wrapped like a caterpillar... I don't think I will be sleeping after 9pm today.I really truly need the sleep. Only just now when Felicia corrected me that I have not been sleeping well these past few WEEKS and not days.. Oppsy, used to saying days that I don't even realise that a few weeks had already passed. SO yeah, I got nothing much to say, all I know is that I am now Physically, mentally and spiritually exhausted...Thats all I can say... Peace out!
Labels: exhausted
Tuesday, August 25, 2009 11:15 PM
Us HUMANS are judgemental and never seem to be satisfied. . . Don't you think so? EVERYONE goes for looks right? Okay okay you may be saying, "No, I don't. Jenny is talking crap." Well a trust me everyone will judge a person by looks. Sometimes, how the person dress, acts or even sometimes walk, can attract you in a way. BUT to some, they REALLY go for looks like REALLY go for looks. Some get attracted to a person of another gender just because he or she has BIG biceps, or she has a body like an "8"...( if you know what I mean. ) Us humans are like that. Thats our nature. 2nd point is that we never seem to be satisfied. Lets say someone bought an ornament,( WTF? an ornament? thats the best example you can give? I give you a big LOL!) and then walks out of the shop. But when the person brings it home and looks at it for a week or so, he or she will start to think,
"Actually this ornament isn't that nice. I should have bought the other one or a much better looking one."
Don't you think so, all of us are like that. We NEVER seem to be satisfied. When we are given a 100years to live, we want to die faster. But when it gets cut short, we complain why is it so. Don't you agree.??
I don't know why but I just feel like saying this.. Just what I observe over God knows how long! OK Chao!
Sunday, August 23, 2009 7:29 PM
Why can't I forget you?! I try not to thing of you but somehow you are ALWAYS there! Why can't I just forget the fact that we were ever together?!! Why can't I seem to erase all those now damned memories that mean anything anymore?!! Why?!! I am trying my F**KING best to forget you, but nothing seems to F**KING work!!! Why?!!! I am TRYING to lie to myself saying, that I wasn't good enough! I am TRYING to lie to myself that you had a VERY goood reasonII don't wanna cry... I don't wanna cry because of this... I don't wanna cry because of you!..
Friday, August 21, 2009 10:44 PM
Time now is only 10.50pm. I emphasise on the ONLY. Cos to me 10.50pm is like 8pm to many! Teehees~ OK lets talk about my day. Today was the last day of prelims! Today's paper was Science.( Ah science, a nice way to end of the last day of prelims ) After school, headed straight home. I promised myself when I woke up this morning that in the afternoon I'll take a nap. I have not been sleeping well lately.( Since when do I ever?) Been sleeping later than 1+ everyday. If I'm lucky, 12+. I am gonna look worse than a panda soon!( Hell yeah, like a panda with the opposite colors ) Its ok, I will get a well deserved rest after N's.( What?! After N's? By then I will look worse than a panda! Awww man~ ) Ok gonna stop here, nothing much to say...
He is now online. Why is that whenever I think of him, see his name, hear his name or even see someone who looks like him, my mind will automaticly say," Ok..back to to square1....*sigh*" Why Why Why?...
"Why is it so freaking hard to forget you? Everywhere I turn, I seem to see your face! Why? I am trying my best, trying my hardest to forget you. Sick and tired of wearing a mask and pretending...Just sick of it..."
Thursday, August 20, 2009 11:56 PM
Had EBS( Elements of Business Skills) and CPA (Computer Applications) prac. today. All I can say is that I think I'll pass(border line) for CPA but as for EBS, I think I'm gonna get a serious a55 woopin' from Ms Shiow man. We were supposed to do a 4 days Itinerary and a letter. OMIGUMMY I finished till day 2. So dead~ I was really killing myself mentally when I left the lab. So terribly disappointed. Cos for EBS paper1 I didn't know how to do much.. So yeah~ There goes my dream of working in the hospitality industry~ LOLS after CPA, I still had alot of time so I opened CorelDraw( a software ) and started drawing PIGUINE!!( Half pig, half penguine!! His parents met in Vegas. HAHAHS!) ok thats all for now, been feeling horrendously tired these few days. . .I need sleeping pills man! But well the doctor thinks I am still young. Next time I shall tell him I am not young as whenever its gonna rain, my back will hurt. So my friends call me old.(maybe cos I'm the oldest among those from my batch in PTC) hahas Jenny Lim Dao Ming is OLD!!!! (Old Little Darling) random much? okok night
Wednesday, August 19, 2009 7:43 PM
I just freakin' hate stupid excuses...Somehow, I don't believe that what you said was true... Somehow there are many loop holes that you didn't cover up properly.. I don't know la, you can now go do whatever you want la huh? Smoke till you are happy huh?! Do whatever your fickled mind tells you to do..!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You know what, thanks for "everything".....The pain, the hurt, the sleepless nights were like cherries on a sundae. Thanks for EVRYTHING!!!!!!!!
Labels: oh wow thanks, the pain was heavenly
Monday, August 17, 2009 11:21 PM
Just wanna start of by saying a very big HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO FELICIA TINGGGGGGGGGGGGGG! Hahas finally you are as old as me.!! *evil laughter* Well we gave Felicia a surprise by buying a cake and surprising her in the canteen. Many were caked on the face too! Hahas fun times, fun times. After school, went home to change then met Fel and Tinyam at PTC. then we head out way to Tamp. Mall. We were waiting for the rest outside Seoul(SIOL) Garden.*blabber crap* Then we went to the arcade, we saw this man who had about $2,900++ in his Tapz card or whatever Timezone card. He was playing this big big big big big sweet catching machine. He managed to gather TONNES TONNES of sweets. I was thinking to myself," Is this dude stocking up for Halloween or something.?" So yeah.. BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH... Then when everyone had arrived, we were crapping like crazy. Here are some vids and pics. Once again, sorry for the atrocious pic quality~
Tinyam && Charlotte;)
Charlene(:
Lol?
Shini and Charlene
Tinyam and Charlotte
Yummy! Hot dogs!!!! >.<
Today Aunty Lily had a private chat with me, we talked about some stuff and she asked me if IT is effecting studies after what happen nearly a month ago, and she also asked if this is really how I feel right now and such... I just got one question, do I really hide my feelings very well?
Saturday, August 15, 2009 10:53 PM
Hellooo dudes and dudettes! Today, yours truly went out with Yi Hong ( ex-sakura college). But I was supposed to meet him at 1 pm at Dhouby Ghout MRT station, and in the end I woke up 12.44pm this afternoon! So I quickly messaged him telling him I would be late. So by the time we met, it was about 3 in the afternoon. (sorry hong hong) So he had already bought the ticks. After that we went to Yoshinoya. Then we just walked around Plaza Sing till it was time to proceed to the Cinema. On the last floor, there is this very interesting shop(CAESARS). It sells authentic guns and samurai swords. I swear its ALL real! They were all so cool! If only they allowed me to take some pics. *puppy pout* Well there were a couple more interesting shops beside it. There was this shop that sold toys and stuff. but not normal toys, there were some helmets of Dar Vader(from Star Wars), Iron man and a few figurines. It was cool. And there were also a few posters sold. There was one Twilight poster but it didnt have Jacob in it, Sad. So after walking around for more than 2 hours, we proceeded to the cinema for our movie. Today we watched, "OPRHAN." Its a thriller show about this orphan. If you yes you sir or ma'am are not afraid of gore and don't mind the "f" word to be said in movies, then this is the show for you. **WARNING** There are a few paintings of nudity.** YOU were warned. So it was okay I guess. I got freaked out a whole lot of times but for YiHong, it was like watching care bears! hahas kidding. So after that I went home. I thought about of alot of things while on my way home. thats all. here are the pics from today. sorry for the atrocious pic quality..
Friday, August 14, 2009 11:19 PM
I just saw him online. When I saw his DN (display name), I felt like crying. I don't know why. It was on the verge of breaking down I swear. Cos it said something like this," Family OR Girlfriend? Well as for me I will choose my family so I am sorry." I am trying not be so lamentable once more, trying not to cry over these kind of things anymore. Trying not to be sad over stupid things anymore. Trying to put on a brave front infront of friends and family to show that I'm alright....Though I truly am not.... I dont know what to do...
Labels: How could I be so stupid
10:53 PM
The time now is 10.59pm. Have been using the comp since I came home right after school. Today has been a pretty good day I guess. In school, had pe. Played softball(woohoos~!) But here's the twist, there weren't much people who wanted to play today so Mr Ng decided to have a class vs class softball match.( 4T1 vs 4E6 ) So on our team there were 9 people. But on the opposing team, there were much more than 15 people.(whoa, unfair much?) But we didn't care. I can say that I am very proud of those who played softball today. Cos;
1. we had fun
2. we played like real sports man
3. we even cheered for the other team members
Everyone was in the mood. Those playing for 4t1 were, Jermyn, Carin, Sharul, Afiqah, Rifqi, Siti, Alger,Zhaireel and I. Both teams took turn to pitch and catch. Well as for me, I skidded a few times on the grass but as always, Jermyn would slide like a bowling bowl aiming for bowling pins.! (no offence Jerm) After an hour, our class won. Then we ALL shook hands with the 4e6 team players hands as a sign that it was a good game. I was happy that we won, but mostly cos everyone did their best and showed good sportsmanship~! Mr Ng himself was also proud of us. Wish that the next time, our WHOLE class could play. Now, THAT would be fun=)
This is Chapter 5,
your voice, your smile, its what keeps me alive~
Wednesday, August 12, 2009 11:51 PM
Yay I got my phone back from repairs!!
woohoos~!
This is chapter 4,
I want to be your friend and more..
Tuesday, August 11, 2009 11:53 PM
Ok it is currently 11.53pm... And I'm feeling utterly poofed out after a long.. Maybe its because I didn't sleep well last night. Dang, I hope those sleepless nights will NOT come back. I miss sleeping like a pig! ^(00)^ Ok well all I can say is that school has been alright I guess. After school, went for an hours of PC(aka detention) then I made my way to PTC for math tuition with uncle Philip. After math had science. I swear, I'm gonna have a sore throat tomorrow after eating all those junk food today during science. Honestly I have not eaten that much junk food in ages. *laughs to self* Ain't that good? LOL, ok well now I'm downloading Sequel2( A music software that enables you to create your own music without the use of instruments. ) && also waiting for my uniform to dry. (dumbo me poured the detergent in and everything BUT stupidly forgot to press the start button.) Oh my oh my am I smart or what? Well so I am currently lethargically infront of the comp waiting for Sequel to finish download after 2 hours. I think I am going to fall asleep on the lap top soon. Ok well until the next time.!
This is Chapter 3,
do you still think of me?
12:09 AM
Today has been a pretty boring day. Maybe because I spent the whole day at home.Yeah well I basically spent the whole day in my room using the laptop. I looked up vids and tabs for "Dumb Reminders" by No use for a name and "Whats My Age Again?" by blink 182. Mainly its because I've been yearning to learn those 2 songs for quite a long time now but just didnt have the time. I didnt learn much of those too, but I did manage to learn the intro, the riff and a little bit of the chorus for "whats my age again". Or I better end all the guitar talk before I bore all readers to sleep.Well just a few mins ago I was doing some last min homework.[ Darn this thing called procastination..!] Can't help it, I've been suffering othis "illness" since I was in primary school.. *laughs head off*.. Well nothing much to talk about, all I know is that I'm gonnna get a whole lot scolding from Ms Toh[ Form Teacher ] tomorrow morning.. *praying silently* I pray she is done with something like amnesia or something tomorrow:-S. And other then that, I would really like to thank those who asked if I was ok and everything,Thanks guys. I REALLY really appreciate it. Thanks for all the concern from all my lovable friends!!
Yeah I agree its hard cos YOU keep appearing in my mind and everywhere I go, you're all that I see. I'm trying my hardest to forget you but somehow I know its not gonna be easy..
{ Words Learnt today; lethargic, mediocre }
This is Chapter 2,
I thought of it as I was thinkin of you~
Sunday, August 9, 2009 10:16 PM
My day has been pretty alright... Started the day lazily.. Then in the afternoon went to Francis's 15th Birthday BBQ at Pasir Ris Park. At fun with the all the girls. Talked and talked and crapped and crapped. Except for the fact that while I was in the sea and I didnt know that there was a big rock beside and my toe scraped on the thing while I was walking. I didnt even know till I came out of the water and saw that my big toe was bleeding. So, the kind and sweet sec2 girls accompanied me to the toilet to clean(aka wash it) As I was washing my wound, there was this lady who noticed my bleeding fat toe and ask me if I had a handiplast. I didn't have one so I just shook my head then she said that she had one and ask me to wait there.When she came back, she handed me a Mickey Mouse plaster.It was blue in colour. It was really cute. After that, we went back and saw that Tin Yam had arrived. So we chatted and talked till dusk. Had fun talking then it was time to go home as I felt tired.(skip the boring stuff) Then after Felicia had walked home and I was alone at the busstop,I teared. Dont ask why. OK gotta go. I wanna watch "300" before it finishes.
♥Hope that you get well soon
Friday, August 7, 2009 11:20 PM
Hey Hey Hey, well my day has been pretty cool. I went to watch "Up" with Felicia and TinYam. I really had fun. And the movie was hilarious.! Everyone should watch it.(unless you aint a cartoon kindda person) But it was REALLY REALLY funny. Thats all I wanna say as I'm feeling pretty tired. Well I just wanna say that TAYLOR LAUTNER IS SOOOOOO HOT!! && I mean Hot with a capital H! hahash well here are some pics of him...
Cute huh? Well thats all for tonight~
This is what I call Chapter1,
because the story has just begun~
Labels: Taylor Lautner
Monday, August 3, 2009 11:37 PM
Today is a Monday. Monday blues + depression = quintuple the sucky-ness. Nothing much today. School was alright I guess. Spent the first half of the morning being emo and trying not to cry in class. Although I kept telling them not to worry that I won't cry as my eyes are too tired to cry.(blood might come out instead of tears, kidding peeps) But then when it was recess, I was starting to feel better a little bit but not really. Just trying to put a brave front. . .Don't like to seem weak infront of friends. . . ok lets skip all the emo-ness. Then went to ptc to have English tuition with dearest Stephanie. After tuition, went to Loyang Point with Fel. But throughout the whole thing I was giving a sad front. I'm so sorry, but the whole day of trying to smile was making my heavy chubby cheeks feel tired.(as if.) Fel was trying to make me smile and everything but somehow I was just to upset. Yeah then came home feeling tired.( but not tired at all now. I think I'm gonna get insomnia soon.) Then talked to someone. We were on the same boat. I comforted him, he comforted me.( friends only please) All I can say is that after counselling him, I somehow felt better. But still somehow the same. I dont know but I think some thing must seriously wrong with me. Someone kill me please? Okok I shall not be so emo, or else I will go back to the old me.(the wrist slashing and excessive panadol eating me.) Which was of cos totally stupid. I admit I wanted to do all of them over the weekend but somehow I managed to restrain myself from doing so. Ok just wanna say thanks to all my friends for comforting me. LOVE YOU GUYS(GIRLS) TONNES!!!
Labels: emo
Sunday, August 2, 2009 11:36 PM
Currently 11.36pm at night, and I am still not a single bit tired.(why am I not surprise. . .) Although I slept at 4am in the morning, I am still not tired. I do yawn from time to time but whenever its my bedtime, I just wanna "ton" the whole night. . .All I can say is that I spent the whole morning and afternoon and a little bit of the evening crying and sleeping.(like a baby.) I just don't know what to say la. Just that... Yeah..... Well I dont have much to talk about... Shall end here.... I'll just eat a few caplets of panadols then, I'll force myself to sleep. . .I miss my phone... But most importantly. . . . . . .I miss him. . . .
*~ I guess that all the times we spent
together are just all a distant memory. . .
I just wanna say. . . .I'm sorry and. . . .
I miss you ~*
Labels: I miss you
Saturday, August 1, 2009 11:39 PM
I guess you life will not be better without me in your life. . . This word "sorry" is just a word. Do you think it will all be better once you apologise. . . Not anymore. . . Whats the point of scolding yourself? It won't make everything get back to what happen a year ago. . . Nothing you say or do will make anything better. . . Whats done is done. . .Nothing or no one can change it. . . You said you were stupid. Instead, I just told you that you are the smart one. . .You chose your family over me. . . While I am the foolish one who chose you and put all my hopes on you. . .&& that was the most foolish thing to do cos I know that this day would come. . . I was foolish. . .You are the smart one. . . && now I'm the one stuck in an abyss of anguish. . .I am the foolish one. . .
Labels: stuck in an abyss of anguish
10:32 AM
Why did you have to go and do it?!..... You told me NOT to do it then YOU went and do it yourself.... Did you even freaking think before you did that? Huh? Did you? Did you even think how I would feel? Did you even how I would react?... But no~ You just went and do it anyways.. You kept saying that I was selfish.. So who is the selfish one now huh? How could you be soooo stupid! You know what? I'm freaking freaking sick and tired of crying and crying over things you do that makes me feel useless or disappointed.. I'm sick and tired of crying over YOUR mistakes...time and time again...sick and tired....
